What we got up to last year!

Hey everyone!


Here is just a small vid of what we got up to at our Safe City Project last year!
As you may or may not be aware, our next one is coming up on Saturday 22nd October!!!!


If you want to get involved or if you want more info, visit our web www.suncoast.org.au/safecityproject


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Suncoast

Marriage, too old skool? - Ps Jonathan

Is marriage too old-school?

I'm 26 years of age and I'm getting married to my best friend next month. So clearly I'm no expert on the issue. But I have definitely grown up in a generation that doesn't seem as fussed about the age-old tradition, to the extent that it maybe doesn't carry the same meanings & values as it has in times past.

This fact however,  has led me to believe that marriage has found new meaning and significance in a way that is perhaps deeper & more cherished. Maybe marriage is more romantic and exciting than ever? From what I've observed about earlier perspectives, people were asked, "why wouldn't you get married?", as though it was socially expected. Today however, someone in my shoes is asked, "why on earth are you?", as though it's an odd thing.

My fiancé put marriage this way to me, "No longer is it out of duty or because it is the done thing, but it is born out of total love and a deep sense of wanting to commit your life forever to one person". One thing I've found quite striking, is that every time I tell the story of how I proposed to her, people frequently respond out of surprise whilst eluding to the fact that 'people just don't do that these days'. The manner in which i courted her, the receiving of her father's blessing before i bought the ring- all this to me seemed beautiful, sacred, and passionate.

I'm not trying to wave the flag of being a romantic or of suggesting one way is better, but rather the thought that not all traditions and practices that are old are necessarily outdated. Although my generation may bork at the idea of being with one person for life, my fiancé seems to like the idea. Which is good for me, because I intend on promising to be with her until death do us part.

Relationships - do you have a healthy one? - Ps Chas

Why can families become divided over an issue like a football game, shout at each other, call each other names, accuse each other of bribery, lying, cheating, have thoughts of inflicting pain and injury and doing that somewhat by throwing objects across the room or at the flat screen, and yet within five minutes of the completion of the game, these hostile, passionate, vengeful enemies are celebrating family life again. 

Relationships are built upon values that are the foundation of longevity of a community existing in harmony. Individuals bring their set of values to the community and there is a hierarchical order from which we assess the relationship. Rarely do families split over supporting a different sporting team, unless faithfulness to a team was the highest value for that family; however I have seen separation over faithfulness to political parties. Faithfulness is an important value if it’s connected to each other’s morality and not opposing teams on a football field. 

When one begins a relationship, most of the conversations are focused around your personal values even though you may not be conscious that you're doing it. Things like morality, truth, transparency, keeping your word (integrity), honesty, stability, courage, tolerance, respect, appearance, kindness, faithfulness and many other values is the hidden back bone of every relationship you are in. Everyone has values and they will sometimes clash or connect like cultures do, directing the future of this relationship.

I personally require my relationship truth, transparency, integrity, honour and generosity way before faithfulness in a hierarchical list of my values. My youngest son was born in New South Wales and we don't like each other’s State of Origin team. We are very verbal about it and last night was no different but our permanent relationship is based on higher values. When relationship get disrupted it’s because an individual’s values have been violated either by lying, cheating, unfaithfulness or dishonour which causes the other party to be devalued, resulting in feeling unsafe and causing them to with withdraw and terminate the relationship.  However, when the proper values are the highest priority in your contribution to your family’s life, you are fostering a very healthy long term connection.

Justice or Revenge? - Ps Chas

Was shooting Bin Laden justice or revenge? In your opinion how much wrong do people have to do before you should be allowed to kill them? When does someone cross the line of no return by their evil actions? Is there a pathway of reconciling people back into healthy relationships once they have crossed that line which has caused severe disappointment, pain, and even loss? 

Most murders in Australia are caused by family members or those in close association with the victim.

Disappointment can be experienced when someone doesn’t fulfill what is perceived should be done for them. This disappointment can grow and begins to cause resentment because of the continuous lack of performance in the relationship on the other party’s part. Resentment can begin to generate a hatred for that person because one hates their behavior. Once hatred in that person has developed because of their behavior, it then causes loss, be it in pleasure, finance, energy, time and especially in expectations.

Some may feel that they can retrieve back some of the loss through revenge. Revenge wants to pay back somebody and it is not often a gradual progress; it is usually a major event.

At the news of Bin Laden’s death, ex-Mayor Giuliani of New York, who lost approximately 3000 members of his city on 9-11, said “He had revenge”.

Revenge invokes anger, violence, bitterness, hatred, and unforgiveness. I believe when you you are committed to seeking justice, it comes out of a heart of compassion, mercy and understanding, but also protection, safety, and wellbeing for all involved. So whatever painful situation you are in, seek justice first and not revenge; justice leads to reconciliation, through understanding and forgiveness – revenge never reconciles any relationship.

Should have Bin Laden been offered reconciliation? Maybe, maybe not!